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Two comments: First, a very accomplished and well-known singer-songwriter-guitarist of my acquaintance used to do background-music bar gigs. He told me he considered them paid rehearsal--he just sat some where inconspicuous and played his material. I'm told he even slightly disguised himself (knit cap pulled low) to reduce the chance of being recognized. Interestingly enough, for the last few years he has held down a weekly gig in a saloon (with, to be sure, a fully equipped pro-level stage and a sound guy) where he has a regular following and a pretty full tip bucket at every show.
Second: I'm no pro, but for 30 years now I've been playing regularly (not GJ) for small (as in laughable) money or good food, nearly exclusively in eateries and coffee houses. And there are always people who pay at least some attention, people who don't, and sometimes people who loudly carrry on with their own social business as though we weren't there at all. That, as they say, is the gig. The deli I've played most is also the home stage for the local folk society, so it has a more music-friendly clientele, so I suppose I'm a bit spoiled. And since this is not a career for me, just getting to play with my musical friends for (occasionally) appreciative listeners, in a space that values music enough to give us house-room is plenty. (I've played a few proper concert setting gigs and I find them stressful--though it's really nice when they go off well. Applause is very reassuring.)
Looks like a Ear Trumpet Labs Myrtle.
Not sure whether the following will make you feel better or worse, but:
It's the same situation for the top players in Paris. Go to Monk (Tavern de Cluny) to see Adrien Moignard or Sebastien Giniaux play, and you'll be astounded how many audience members are loudly talking the whole time, totally ignorant of the music.
I'm wondering, @B25Gib, how you responded to the "'We Are 'BACKGROUND MUSIC ONLY'" reprimand.
Personally, I think thats the bitter pill to swallow with this topic. But there are also the dangers of internalizing this mentality. As @MichaelHorowitz pointed out above, the venues & the audiences can take their toll over time by getting us to lower our standards.. not listening, just not caring as much.
Did two shows in Charleston SC this past weekend. First time playing live after a 10-year or so hiatus. First night a restaurant gig, second night a cafe hosting live music shows with a captive audience. Different vibe each night. In each situation, I am being paid to be an entertainer, so that’s my job. Assess the situation and crowd and play accordingly.
And as has been said already, the low key background gigs are great for nailing down your set list, working on sections and ideas (and not worrying about all those free clams I served up to the diners, lol).
I think if a player lets restaurant gigs lower their standards to the point that it affects more concert-ish performances that's on the player more so than the audience at the restaurant gig. And I've definitely played with people who "phone it in" on restaurant gigs and it sucks, makes for a long night.
You have to make the best of what you're being asked to do. Background music gigs are a great opportunity to work on your ballads, waltzes, etc. I gig a lot but am selective about what I take. Play with people you like at venues who treat you well and it won't feel like work at all even if the audience isn't showering you with praise or attention.
That, ∆∆∆, how is the place treating us, is much more important than the restaurant goers. Why would I expect from anyone to pay attention to me? Unless they came specifically to see our band, they're there to enjoy the meal and hopefully enjoy the live music. I play a gig in DC at a French restaurant where there are a few couples who come specifically for our band and a dinner. They get a table where they can see the band and watch and listen.
Obnoxiously loud people are annoying but even that can turn out good. The best bar gig I've ever had was in Chicago in a wine bar. The place was packed but there was a guy so loud that his voice was so much louder than anything else. Eventually he started interacting with us, because he's that kind of a guy. We were joking with him (even though he was big and loud, he was sort of non threatening) and eventually he turned the whole place into our concert. Every sole in the place was there to listen to us at that moment and we'd get a roaring applause after each song. The vibe was incredible. Writing this makes me wonder "did that really happen" but it did. The guy came up to us after the gig and we talked. Turned out to actually be a nice person, but he has that "larger than life" personality and wants to be the center of attention, and had a few drinks in him. Even though once he turned everyone's attention to us, he was just a concert goer, just listening and hollering.
Also (if I'm reading it right @JasonS said that too), I was always a little perplexed with "oh treat this is a paid rehearsal" attitude. To each their own, however people want to see it is fine by me. But I show up at a most casual bar gig with the same mindset as the theater concert gig. At both I want to be just as prepared, sound my best, I want to be as relaxed as I can be (this is of course easier at a more casual place ) and I'm focused the same at both. Ok, if for whatever reason there's a song or two where I don't feel rock solid, I'll stress less at a casual place. But I won't go into it thinking that I can afford to prepare less for one than the other.
Play with people you like at venues who treat you well and it won't feel like work at all even if the audience isn't showering you with praise or attention.
A lot of great thoughts on this thread that I agree with. I think it could be okay to engage with restaurant/bar patrons during your show, even if you aren't the focus of the evening (i.e. background). By that I mean talking between songs or telling song names or original composers, introducing the band, etc. Often, between sets, I'll go out and chat with audience members that I saw taking note or applauding during certain songs, etc. You never know where your next gig might be coming from. We've had a few people recently reach out to us to play for their events because they saw us play background at a local cidery. Their events were wedding gigs or private functions, so nicer performances.
But, I like the quote above from @JasonS . If the venue isn't treating you well, why bother? And why play with disagreeable people? If you are lucky enough to play with great friends and great musicians (like I am), then it is basically someone paying you to hang out with your buds and play music, something I'd probably do with them for free anyhow. Only difference might be that I have to dress up a bit nicer.
Interesting thread and a dilemma we musicians and audience members face:
I first encountered this as an audience member seeing John Scofield at the renowned jazz club Sweet Basil in NYC. I went with the sole purpose of listening to Sco. However it was challenging due to majority of patrons eating dinner and not giving a toss about who was playing. I also got the sense Sco and his band didn't enjoy either and it was more a "working" gig for them. This was in stark contrast to when I saw same band in Europe when they seemed inspired and connected with the audience.
For me also the primary thing is to play live with good friends you connect well with and have fun! We play a regular food cart gig and parents bring their young toddlers down for early dinner and the kids go crazy "dancing" to our music. The smile on their faces and carefree fun they're having while challenging to concentrate on our playing. Is a joy to see! ...plus who knows perhaps the next Bireli is there being inspired!🙂
The food cart owner loves our music and supports us well and invites us regularly, which allows us to have a regular gig to woodshed & test drive new tunes in front of a not too critical audience! ...plus we got a private party gig when one of the parents booked us to play a summer backyard event.
I have a regular day job, so the additional dosh is "icing on the cake" and helps pay for new strings 🙂
Main thing is play with folk you like, have fun and if you don't like the venue then chose not to play gig.
I once did a gig at an old folks home when I was younger and before my Django days. It was soul destroying as one by one each of the old folks got up and zimmered off. Eventually there was one old boy who was sound asleep so I stopped only to be told to continue by a nurse. I did as requested and as I finished my last song the old boy woke up and said "thanks very much son" before he too shuffled off.
Roll on a few years and I played with some friends at a charity gig in a posh hotel. It was disaster from the start. The PA was terrible and was provided by two guys who used it for playing cd's through it so it was entirely unsuited for an acoustic gypsy jazz band. Plus the fact it was sited miles away from where we were situated. We played while people had their meal and at best we were totally ignored but a few people were complaining about the volume level which we had no control over. At the end we left the stage to nothing, no applause no acknowledgement , nothing. To make it worse we weren't even thanked by the organisers.
Never again.